How did I do it?

I was sitting in my office on Monday when a lady I know came in. She has been struggling to stay sober so she asked me how I have stayed clean and sober for 4 years. We had a long conversation where I listened to some of her story and told her about what has worked for me. I felt like it is important to share with others as well. So here we go...

First of all, I must remember that I can't do this on my own. I need the help of my Lord and Savior, Jesus. I have not done this on my own. And when I start thinking that is me that has done this, that is where I start to go wrong. I have to stay away from the pride of what has been done in my life. Cause it can all go away in one second. Without Jesus I am nothing!

Second, I can never forget what it was like. What it was like to feel that hopelessness and despair that made me feel like I wanted to die. What it was like waking up in the morning not knowing what happened the night before. What it was like to not be able to make it through the day without using.

Third, I must practice acceptance. Acceptance of who I am, of my past, and all the things that have happened in my life to make me who I am. I must accept that I can never, ever, under any circumstances, drink or use again. Because the minute I do, I will have lost all that I have gained- joy, love, peace, a relationship with God, and self-respect. The most important thing is my relationship with God. But, that is a topic for another blog.

Fourth, is to stay focused on myself and God. I can't worry about what other people are thinking or doing or what they have that I don't. Like Paul says in Philippians 3:13-14, "But one thing I do: forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus."

Next, is staying grateful. Besides staying focused on God, I think this may be the most important tool in my recovery. When I start thinking about the things that I don't have, I have to turn that around and think about the things I do have. I am blessed beyond measure.

Lastly, I must watch my thoughts because thoughts can turn into actions. As soon as I think about taking a drink, I have to stop that thought as soon as it comes. If I start entertaining that idea in my head, it won't be too long before I am using or drinking. So when I start having thoughts I shouldn't, I try to sing. At first I didn't know the lyrics to any good, Christian songs so I started out singing "Jesus Loves Me" until I learned others. Scripture has also been a huge help to changing my thoughts. 2 Corinthians 10:4-5 says, "The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ." I try to memorize different verses so I can meditate on them instead of my problems. In that way, I am doing what Romans 12:2 says, "Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is - his good, pleasing, and perfect will."

These are just some of the ways I have been able to maintain my sobriety. They are not in any particular order.